|photo taken from jembling.com|
Any day now, she thought to herself. She shivered from the cold and drew the blanket around herself. Her thoughts again began to wander. It was so hard to fall asleep and stay asleep these past few nights. She would often wake up, having to go to the bathroom. Her back hurt from the weight of lugging around a baby while doing all of her daily chores.
What will he look like? she thought to herself. Dark skin, dark hair, of course. Will he look like me? Or will he look like.....she stopped. God? Will he look like you?
Especially at night when her mind was racing, she couldn't make sense of it all, even after having a whole nine months to get used to it. Why me? Why did God chose me? And what does this all even mean? And how will we raise the Son of God? What if we mess him up?
I don't know if I can handle this.
When the doubts overwhelmed her, or when she felt like she couldn't handle this responsibility, she remembered the messenger God had sent to her to deliver this good news. She took a deep breath. Yes, the assurance of the reality of it all.
And Elizabeth. God had given her this sister to walk with during this whole pregnancy. It wasn't too much earlier when God had done a miracle in Elizabeth and Zechariah's life too. To think- a baby boy for them, after so many years of trying and trying and trying, yet to no avail! She remembered the first time the boys "met." Elizabeth was about 6 months along, and she said her baby lept within her when he heard Mary's voice.
That Elizabeth is so sweet. For the next three months, Elizabeth and Mary spent the days preparing...mostly for Elizabeth's son, but also for Mary's. They spent time marvelling over how God had chosen them for such a time as this. Together they wondered what life would look like after the boys were born. Would the boys be good sleepers? Would they like each other? Their time together was intimate and unforgettable. After Elizabeth had John, Mary left to go back home.
And now she was here. In Bethlehem. A strange town where she didn't know many people. And she was great with child, wondering how life was going to change any day now. Was she ready? Was Joseph ready?
*Sigh* Go to sleep. You need your rest, she told herself. She resettled herself and slowly began to drift off to sleep....